After my very talented friend took pictures of our house for our profile book (backstory here), I thought, "why not share them?" So that's what I'm doing! These pictures are just a glimpse into our home, our future baby's nursery and our lives, but if y'all like it, I'll share more from time to time. As far as the nursery goes, we don't have anything on the walls yet; we're waiting to be chosen and find out the gender before we go there. So right now it's a lot of gray and a little bit of yellow. I have several ideas in mind in case we get the "come to the hospital" call and I need to decorate after the fact. I'm starting to see either a bird or elephant theme emerge, I love the idea of a gallery wall with different shaped frames in various colors and I'm also thinking about a feature wall with either stripes or polka dots. Ever since I volunteered at the Levine Children's Hospital NICU, walked by their adorable gift shop and saw the GIANT stuffed giraffe I've loved the idea of an animal theme, especially a giraffe/elephant/bird theme. And as far as colors go, if we get a girl, I'm SO adding pink accents and if it's a boy, we'll stick with yellow. I'm sure you can tell which way this girl is leaning. We left a lot of boxes unchecked in our adoption application so that our chances would be higher and we are trusting that God has the perfect child already chosen for us and didn't want to limit that. But yes, this girl wants a girl. :)
So here's an interesting update: as of Friday, I thought we were close to the one month mark of waiting (we were home-study approved on May 13th) BUT we actually aren't even on the list yet because we still owe a balance to our agency. This news came as a bit of a surprise along with some frustration. I had thought we were on the list once we were homestudy-approved. I thought we'd already been waiting four weeks! I was admittedly a little down because part of me thought we might get chosen right away. So to find out we're not even "official" yet....ugh, let's just say there were some tears. My wonderful hubby reminded me what I've said to him over and over - that God has this and the timing will be perfect. It's just hard in that moment to shift your thinking, accept what is and what can't be changed and move forward. Not to mention it's been a bit of a debacle getting our funds from our loan company because they wanted the final homestudy approval in order to release them. However, our agency actually needed the funds once we were homestudy approved! So we're actually LATE in paying our agency, although they are being very flexible with us as the payment schedule changed while we were mid-process. We had to have all 26 pages of our homestudy mailed to us since the loan company wanted the entire thing, only to find out later they only needed the first and last pages. Then I had to go open an account at a credit union so I wouldn't have thousands of dollars sitting in my account (and so it can accrue better interest). Since I wasn't currently a member of said credit union, the large check has to be held for nine days. #SIGH. So where it stands now is that we won't have access to the money until June 23rd. Hopefully we'll be able to transfer that amount to our agency online so we can actually BE ON THE WAITING LIST! Again, #sigh. On the one hand I'm grateful for a week and a half of not being able to be chosen, as the constant state of stress of knowing a phone call could come at any time is much more than I expected. But on the other hand, I'm a little bummed that ONCE AGAIN I'm back at square one; I feel like this is a continuing theme in my life. Perhaps God is trying to teach me something. But at the end of the day I'm trusting that we will get a baby, that God has chosen this baby specifically for us and that the timing will be right. I will continue to say this to myself, as some days are harder than others.
I hope you enjoy these photos! And for any of you out there who may also be in the #paperpregnant stage, please feel free to reach out with any questions or advice! Again, some days are easier than others, but again I must remember that "my days are planned, He knows the number of hairs on my head" and "He has good plans for me" as well as an inheritance in heaven, into which all believers are adopted (and let's not forget the most important adoptee - JESUS!) and knowing that reminds me that He has heard my prayers and will answer them according to His timeframe. Lord give me strength and peace while I wait.